2nd Taunt - All Images Copyright Reality Lite, Inc. 2006

Home Depot Hires the Handicapped

2009-03-11T16:31:00.000-07:00

While you may think that it is a good thing to help the mentally disabled, it is a severe trial to do business with a company fully staffed with total retards. I had the unmitigated joy of buying carpet from them, which I strongly caution you the reader to avoid at all costs!!

Here is the scenario:

1. I buy some carpet that is reduced because it is the end of the role and arrange for the HD people to come out and measure my house so that I can buy the rest of the carpet and have them install it.

2.) A week and a half later they show up to measure.

3.) Time passes without them calling as they advertised.

4.) I go to the store to try and buy the carpet for the rest of the house, the inexpensive padding, and arrange installation.

4.) Time passes at the store - about an hour. Short story, they want me to bring back the carpet that I already bought so that I can prove that I am buying all of the carpet from them for the install.

5.) I go get the carpet. Bring it back. Try to buy it again along with more carpet and some cheap padding.

6.) time passes - 1-1/2 hours.

7.) After re-doing the bill 3 times because they have to make it for 2 different carpets, they managed to screw up which parts got which carpet, which padding they were supposed to be selling me, and how to apply a coupon for 10% off (padding is apparently not a product in their eyes even thought they sell it by the square foot), speaking to 3 different associates (you can take off the last 7 letters of that word), I finally arranged to leave while they were gnashing their teeth over another re-do and having forfeited the clearance price on the second piece of carpet in the interest of getting home before I died of malnutrition.

I am convinced that the chances of them managing to arrange a time to install this carpet, bring out the right products in the correct quantities, and get it installed on the floor without setting the house on fire or gluing it to the ceiling, is about 0%.

I need to caution you friends to avoid this experience. Install tile, clean existing carpets, pay 500% the going rate to get someone else to do it. But do not under any circumstances attempt to buy carpet and installation from Home Depot. They are a great bunch of humanitarians, but they should never ever ever be relied upon for any service of any sort.

If however you have someone you truly hate, and long to see driven insane, please send them there with your recommendation. I guarantee you will be pleased with the results!

How about a new picture while I am at it?

2007-12-21T09:13:00.000-08:00

New way

2007-12-21T09:07:00.000-08:00

Dangerous as this may be because it makes sense.

I suggest instead of elections we have gigantic Sim City battles and whoever wins by November takes the Govenor's spot. The winner will have obviously shown that they have what it takes, and all of the losers test out on harmless pretend persons instead of ourselves and our friends and family.

Actually I see no down side and think we could drum up a grass roots support for the concept. Not only that but no one would have to watch any more crap promises on TV anymore. We can just see news bites on who is leading in the tournaments instead of the polls.

What do you think?

Maybe I can develop a new set for the task, the city, county, state and national versions for politicians. Could be the ticket to wealth and power. LOL

If I went bad I could also sell the cheats to the highest bidder.

Been Awhile...

2007-04-16T05:55:00.000-07:00

...since I was here on my blog. Comerica stole my soul for 2-1/2 months. Oh well. I am back now, but traveling a bit so don't expect a miracle here. LOL

Having a great time in Florida and I got the sunburn to prove it LOL. Three more days down here and then I am back to see what they have been doing in Michigan with the weather. I hope that they have quit screwing around with the snow by now, as it is almost May.

Today we (Pamela and I) are going to Myakka River State Park which is a low cost expedition to an area that embodies the real Florida, or at least what the real Florida used to be. http://www.myakkariver.org/ It is about an hour drive from where we are staying with my friend Linda. It is chock a block with alligators and birds and wild pigs etc.

Yesterday we went to MOSI because it was sorta rainy and were pleasantly surprised to find that we showed up on free day. it was a little crowded because of it, but still a nice way to spend the day. http://mosi.org/ Basically we just wanted to go to an IMAX theater. They have one of the domed ones there which I think are way cooler than the regular big flat screens and saw "Hurricane" which was pretty interesting. Also they had big exhibits on sea, and bodies, and natural disaters, plus a butterfly house. Found out that my heart rate was 64 and blood pressure was 120/72 so I guess this wild living that I do must be good for ya.

Too boring to post

2007-02-12T17:17:00.000-08:00

Well you guys should all send me some cash. I could probably make a great case for being paid not to blog, seeing as pretty much everything that I have to say is intensely boring these dayz.

The good news is that must mean that life can't be too bad. Every time I have much interesting to say, it generally indicates that I am living through a disaster. This apparently brings out the writer in me.

So three cheers for nothing to blog. Huzzah!

Answer me these questions three...

2007-01-14T11:43:00.000-08:00

I the help of persons that date or are interested in men.

Could you annswer whichever of the questions you feel moved to, and could you please pass this link on to anyone that you know, for them to do the same?

I would appreciate it. (Please keep it clean)

I am collecting data for an exciting new idea (to me anyway) and I need input from everyone.(no limit on responses for any given question.)

I will post tablulations of answers as soon and as often as possible.

1.) What are THE things you love most to find in a guy?

2.) What things have you been surprised to find out about a guy you have dated? (good and bad)

3.) What things do you hate to see in a guy?

OK there are more than 3 questions. So sue me.

4.) What kind of guy do you like physically?

5.) What profesions do you find intriguing for a guy to be in?

6.) Preference to race, age, intellect, etc...?

7.) What is the most romatic thing you can think of?

Going crazy in 2nd level support

2007-01-05T05:12:00.000-08:00

Today I have only had things that start with the letter B for Breakfast.

Bacon
Bagel
Beverage

Now I am wondering what I can have for Lunch…

I may have to switch from the breakfast lunch dinner model, to the breakfast, dinner supper model if I get stuck.

I need a more challenging job over here I guess.

Question of the day - no cheating

2006-12-08T06:47:00.000-08:00

Why is there an apostrophe in the possessive? Like Linda's photos?

The English language being totally nonsensical (probably because it was invented by a bonehead like a certain administrator) originally had the syntax of:
Mark, his wiener dog, left a big turd on Bob, his porch, again.

The rank and file would have none of that however and contracted out all of the stupidity.

Catholic news flash

2006-12-05T03:50:00.000-08:00

Catholic representatatives of the Ford Interfaith Network dedicate day of prayer for the corporation.
Dec. 08 - Dearborn, Michigan

These people have taken a day out of their time when they could have been praying to win the lotto, like they normally do, in order to make these special prayers.

I am certain that the Happy God of the Bibile is in the heavens laughing like a maniac and wondering if they might consider doing some meaningful work on the job.

I am currently taking suggestions for other possibly neglected areas that these groups could pray for the next time they leverage their collective bargaining power.

Hold your Horses

2006-11-29T04:53:00.000-08:00

Hey, this weather has been so swell that I had to go out for a ride in Hell on Buddy yesterday. Yep that's right my buddy, Buddy, is in Hell. His former digs in Brighton lost their lease and everyone moved lock stock and barrel to Hell Creek Ranch.

Even though it was hunting season and beer soaked heavily armed republicans stalk the woodlands of Livingston County this time of year, I had to go. It was fabulous! I tied orange tape on Bud's mane and tail and we went for a brisk walk through the wilds of Pinckney Recreation Area. Well at least it was a brisk walk out, but he wanted to run full throttle back to his new pasture. He must like it there. Or else he was freaked out by the new set of trees and bushes in Hell.

For myself, I enjoyed looking at new trees and vines as I was becoming jaded to the ones at Brighton. The trails are nicer in Hell too, not so many rocks. I didn't see another sole and between Buddy shouting out hoping to find other horses, and my singing when a good song came on my iPod (which was most of the time no surprise seeing as I picked the songs on that thing) we managed to not get shot as an oversized deer.

Every time I think that I am foolish to keep such a obvious waste of money, I go for a ride like yesterday, and renew my vows of fiscal irresponsibility. Anything that can make a woman sliding at breakneck speed down the backside of the (over the) hill feel like a amazon warior, must certainly be worth any amount of money. I will continue to charge into old age and bankruptcy on the back of a Tenneesee Walker through Hell.

In other news I joined a gym. I am now going with my entire 21st century family to the Howell Fitness Center. It is a pretty cool gym, not fancy, but run by a bunch of slightly crazed nice guys. Which reminds me, I have a 4:00 today with a personal trainer, a first for me. You can expect a full report on this anticipated debacle ASAP. LOL My plan is to be able to kick the butt of anyone making fun of an old woman riding hirses through Hell. :)

Quiz of the day

2006-11-22T08:30:00.000-08:00

Quiz - Generally speaking words that end in y when pluralized adhere to the rule take off the y and add ies. pony=ponies What common words can you think of that do not follow this rule? I can only think of 2 right off hand and they are related. Day and Holiday. Maybe it is the whole ay thing. fray and frays tray and trays woo woo I think I am on to something. But really, let me know if you think of something different.

visiting in pajamas

2006-11-20T18:54:00.001-08:00

You know that they are good friends with someone when you can go visiting in your pajamas. That is what me and Mark did. Visited Pamela and Brandon Roche after dinner. Mark to help Brandon the aspiring mountain man scrape a deer hide and Pamela and I wisely chit chatted about Ecuador and female prisoners while drinking wine. The guys reported hearing a car crash which seems like a weird thing to report. But sure enough 1/2 hour later when we were driving home we saw every emergency vehicle in Livingston county parked on D-19 just short of the intersection of Coon Lake Rd. on the south side with their drivers inspecting what seemed to be a 2 vehicle crash that looked pretty nasty. I am sure that we can read about it in the morning paper.

Zootie went to the vet and needs to lose 40 pounds and eat more protein. Hmmm... She is even too fat to be sedated to get the tumor off of her eyelid. Looks like she is not going to be leaving a very nice corpse. She is 9 which translates to 63 in dog years but I would put her closer to 80.

The wiener dog next door has been a lot quieter since I went over there to complain about him. I wasn't too sure if she was gonna settle him down or not seeing as she announced it wasn't fair to keep him in the house all day when I had just pointed out that he had barked at my son for 8 straight hours. Now anyone who reasons that a wiener's personal enjoyment of a day should trump that of a household of 4 humans is not one in who you would put much confidence in doing the right thing. Of course given the number of wiener killing firearms in the household, I am reckoning that I cannot be held accountable for any fatalities resulting from fanatical barking, and she may have picked somewhat up on that. The dog has worn a huge hole in their lawn from repeated bouncing in place as he barks. Bark, bounce, bark, bounce. 1 bark = 1 bounce. I figure he does about one a second when he is outside. He does not seem to have a limit on the number of consecutive seconds that he can bark. Maybe he is actually a Jack Russell terrier that has compacted his legs through repeated pile driving into the ground and not a wiener after all. If he keeps it up, he may be digging his own .......

visiting in pajamas

2006-11-20T18:54:00.000-08:00

You know that they are good friends with someone when you can go visiting in your pajamas. That is what me and Mark did. Visited Pamela and Brandon Roche after dinner. Mark to help Brandon the aspiring mountain man scrape a deer hide and Pamela and I wisely chit chatted about Ecuador and female prisoners while drinking wine. The guys reported hearing a car crash which seems like a weird thing to report. But sure enough 1/2 hour later when we were driving home we saw every emergency vehicle in Livingston county parked on D-19 just short of the intersection of Coon Lake Rd. on the south side with their drivers inspecting what seemed to be a 2 vehicle crash that looked pretty nasty. I am sure that we can read about it in the morning paper.

Zootie went to the vet and needs to lose 40 pounds and eat more protein. Hmmm... She is even too fat to be sedated to get the tumor off of her eyelid. Looks like she is not going to be leaving a very nice corpse. She is 9 which translates to 63 in dog years but I would pt her closer to 80.

The wiener dog next door has been a lot quieter since I went over there to complain about him. I wasn't too sure if she was gonna settle him down or not seeing as she announced it wasn't fair to keep him in the house all day when I had just pointed out that he had barked at my son for 8 straight hours. Now anyone who reasons that a wiener's personal enjoyment of a day should trump that of a household of 4 humans is not one in who you would put much confidence in doing the right thing. Of course given the number of wiener killing firearms in the household, I am reckoning that I cannot be held accountable for any fatalities resulting from fanatical barking, and she may have picked somewhat up on that. The dog has worn a huge hole in their lawn from repeated bouncing in place as he barks. Bark, bounce, bark, bounce. 1 bark = 1 bounce. I figure he does about one a second when he is outside. He does not seem to have a limit on the number of consecutive seconds that he can bark. Maybe he is actually a Jack Russell terrier that has compacted his legs through repeated pile driving into the ground and not a wiener after all. If he keeps it up, he may be digging his own hole.......

Click the link below and then be nice!

2006-11-17T17:29:00.000-08:00

Check this out!

It is a new and shameless way to attract even more attention to yourself if you are desperate enough to try it.

New business idea 1452

2006-11-17T08:57:00.000-08:00

I am thinking of developing an entire line of persona changing shirts.

We could have "Tuxedo Tee for those impromptu formal occasions, Tough Guy Tee (with fake muscles sewn in), Reversible Gang Tee (crips/bloods) for persons trying to blend in with whatever gang that they see on the next corner, "I am really wearing a tie Bob" Tee, the Tarp Tee for sloppy eaters, Beer Cooler Tee and Flask Tee (with straw) for alcoholics, Hot Naked Bod Tee (could also be reversible for switch hitters could be marketed as the Transvestite Tee) for those short of vision, or hoping to attract same, Doctor Tee (might improve a guy's chances with the women), Pirate Tee for Steve, Cop Tee to keep in the car so that by the time the cop gets to your door you look just like him, and of course the ever popular Secret Society Tee which you cannot remove from the wrapper.

Why stop there? I am sure that there are many more styles that would be good sellers.

Misc. Complaining

2006-11-17T05:18:00.000-08:00

Either I see a place that would be great to work for but am not the exact person they want (mainly because the job I am currently in doesn't let me do what I would like to do so therefore I have no experience doing it) or I think I am perfectly qualified and find I don't really want the job. For these reasons I may be sitting tight for now.

If any of you all know of some place that is looking for a swell photographer I may just give I.T. the heave ho!

My Hero

2006-11-12T20:02:00.000-08:00

This guy is way too awesome for words. Vlad Studio

Too Much Work Over an Article

2006-11-11T21:20:00.000-08:00

What the.... Those guys at the Press messed me up by putting my article in a week early. My site was nowhere close to being finished and I have been working like a maniac trying to get it so it is not embarassing. I am making some headway though and have almost enjoyed looking through all of my images of the last year and a half. I gotta wonder how many I could cough up in avout 4 or 5 years then. Frightening. I need to find someone to start selling them for me or else....

Anyhow, I guess not too much came of the spot in the press so far. I am going to take a chance to meet John Galloway a press photographer and maybe get some insights from him.

I just spent some money with google too, to promote the site. It all seems sort of futile at times though. But I did promise myself that I would extend every effort to see this through. Someone out there somewhere is going to have to see something in those pictures worth taking a chance on. I hope.

Sigh...

The site is up and working!!

2006-11-06T21:23:00.000-08:00

Yeah baby. My DNS Ship has come in!!!

Now to get your free pictures everyday go to the Reality Lite, Inc. web site.

From here on out I plan on making that site mo betta. Stay tuned for the exciting conclusion. Every day a new free picture for your computer, and we will be adding merchandise, licnesing sets, etc. Send your friends and relatives, your boss and your neighbors.

I dont wanna be a geek anymore, I wanna be a .... Lumberjack!!

Oops, wrong. I meant to say I want to be an artiste! Yaeh, that's the ticket. That way I can be as crazy as I want to be. The crazier I become, the more in demand my work will be. I will stop short of suicide however, in that I have to much to do to be dying just yet.

Lost in Time

2006-11-06T19:05:00.000-08:00

I have been frantically trying to figure out how to manufacture hours. I simply cannot keep up with my own idea of what can be done in a day. Luckily Ford has taken pity and given everyone the day off tomorrow to vote. Although it is a poor excuse for a holiday, I will be more than glad to take it. I also saved up my paid time off from another useless holiday that my contract house dolls out and Ford does not(Columbus day) and am using it to subsidize this one that Ford does and Logica does not. I have had a horrible day the likes of which none of you want to hear about. Trust me on this one it was bad.

Anyway here is the picture I owe and another for today. Tomorrow I will see if I can get my domains straightened out.

Cold weather is not good

2006-11-04T19:51:00.000-08:00

I love sneaking up on bugs. Also frogs are at risk. I am surprised that the whole lot hasn't moved over to the neighbor's house. Probably the fact that they have dogs able to move faster than your standard glacier made them reassess their options and they opted for the crazy protographer lady. But admit that I can see them cringe when I come toward them with a camera. Too bad.

That does it!

2006-11-03T19:39:00.000-08:00

I just bought parking space for all three of my domains at godaddy.com. My hosting service has my email so screwed up that apparently only sleazy porn spam is allowed in and if you are a friend or associate there is no way to email me. Then they sent me a bill for $300 and I just couldn't bring myself to pay it. Especially in light of the fact that I can't get into the site to edit it with either FrontPage or Coffee Cup! So sorry to rant like this, but it is so frustrating when all I want to do is to spread joy to my fellow man by giving away some swell pictures.

Ah well, here is today's, (yet again on the blog) but soon the doman will be switched back to some name server where the admin has an idea of how to let persons edit their web site (I HOPE!!!) Until then we will make do. Remember that this picture is really bigger, just click on it to see it full size and right click on it to save it to you computer.

Free Background #2

2006-11-02T18:57:00.000-08:00

The sad facts remain. I can't figure out where in the directory structure to put my pictures on RealityLite.com yet, and the hosting guys are on a bender. So I am hoping that by tomorrow I will be posting them in the correct spot. So for now rest assured that this is really an 800 x 600 pixel picture and it will spread out nicely on your monitor once you save it. It was taken on Honymoon Beach in Florida after Hurricane Ernesto almost caused trouble, but being Mexican it felt disinclined to put forth the effort. Now was that NOT PC or what? Sorry, apparently still suffering from some bitterness over a certain relationship we will not go into at this time. Remember the high resolution versions of any of these free images are available for sale through my site.

Car Shopping

2006-11-02T05:19:00.000-08:00

Forewarned is fore armed. Knowledge is power, blah blah blah. :)
No matter how you slice it I like a deal.
For those of you who are car shopping do not pay more than you have to. These links might help.

Buy Cars Below Invoice
All New 2006-2007 Cars On Sale Now Free MSRP and Actual Quotes - Fast!
www.AutoQuotes.com

New 2007 Car Prices
Find the Lowest Price in Your Area. Get a New Car Invoice Quote Today!
www.SmartCarPrices.com

How to Pay Dealer Cost
Insider Tips and Tricks to Buying New 2006 Cars at Dealer Invoice
www.motoreports.com

Dealer quote Quote
New Cars Below Invoice. Let Local Dealers Compete. Takes Only 60 Secs
www.YourCarPoint.com

Shop For New Car
Find cars selling below invoice with local cash-back offers.
LocalCarPrices.com

Freakin' Computers!

2006-11-01T17:50:00.000-08:00

Disaster!!! I cannot get in the correct folder in realitylite.com to put the picture of the day up. So I am going to put the first one here if I can.

Today's Free Picture Is: Bev

This started as a gerbera daisy.
Windows Users - Right click and choose "Save as background"
Stop back tomorrow for another!

Oops I'm a geek!

2006-11-01T10:31:00.000-08:00

I made a new blog to keep my tech stuff in. Nuff said

New Idea

2006-10-31T15:46:00.000-08:00

OK You guys. I have decided to set up a picture of the day deal on my RealityLite.com site. Starting tomorrow I will put up a big beautiful picture for you to download to your desktop suitable to use for a background image. Every day I will put up another one. And yes it will be free. You can also use them on personal web sites if you would like. I only ask that you give me a credit with a link to my site. If you see one that you want to use commercially, I do ask that you purchase it however. All the images will be copyrighted by Reality Lite, Inc. I think I will start with a dragonfly. Just wait, it will be so cool.

Don't look at anything under Artsy Fartsy!!!

2006-10-27T16:01:00.000-07:00

Now I know that means that most of you will look at the stuff under Atrsy Fartsy just to be cute, but I mean it when I say you will be sorely disappointed. I can't find my old posts so you all will have to be content with my new ones.

Before I get too involved with my new and shameless word of self promotion, I wanted to share a few thoughts about my most excellent adventure with Korima and the 27 girls at the Big Bend in Texas last week. It was a great time for everyone with the exception of a certain amount of homesickness and throwing up.

I want to say that it was not me that was either homesick or throwing up. But there was certainly enough of that to go around. 1/2 the troupe was carsick driving down the 27 mile long ranch driveway and we had to stop so that one unnamed individual could spread their breakfast out amongst the cacti. And then the McDonald Observatory Star Cafe thought that they could get one more day out of those hot dogs that they served 12 in our party apparently. Oops.

But I made some nice new friends and had the time of my life. I wanted to go back before I got home. I have been emailing some of the kids and hope to stay in touch. If you want to see all the photos (well at least the ones that I uploaded to the Wal Mart web sit for printing) Go here

Artsy Fartsy

2006-10-27T15:47:00.000-07:00

Ok all you guys, you've been waiting for it and now it's here. 2nd Taunt is back, bigger and better than ever. (Well the bigger part is a definte lie but the better part hopefully is true)

As that those of you that know me are aware of, I am hoping to get launched in the frightening world of art.

I imagine that this blog will be a shameless plug for Reality Lite and a sleazy attempt to get artistic representation.

So if you know where I can find stores that want to carry my images or agents in need of a crazy unique talent to add to their stable, or if you want to buy something for your livingroom, LET ME KNOW!

Me

2006-09-15T08:52:00.000-07:00

Here I am as close to Mexico as I could get. That is the Rio Grande behind and under me. It was a glorious day and a very happy time in my life.

You never know

2006-07-14T04:31:00.000-07:00

OK here is one small step for recreating my blog, Mark has the computer with my past posts on it and will be around with it Saturday. I will get that restored and then I should be feeling fine for forging onward.

Grant Total

2006-03-21T06:19:00.000-08:00

Don't forget to write about Grant Totals

Pigs, Pigs & Loss or Another Day at Work.

2005-08-11T12:07:00.000-07:00

Freudian Slip and You

2005-08-03T07:28:00.000-07:00

No Fun Here or Else!

2005-07-22T11:31:00.000-07:00

Another Swell Typo

2005-07-19T07:37:00.000-07:00

OK so I didn't write this one myself...

2005-07-14T18:04:00.000-07:00

Science Professionals

2005-06-21T06:40:00.000-07:00

OK then..

2005-06-13T10:49:00.000-07:00

We Are All Professionals Here

2005-02-07T11:26:00.000-08:00

Read this Before Reproducing

2005-02-04T07:25:00.000-08:00

But Wait, There's More!

2005-02-03T13:00:00.000-08:00

Sexual Harrassment

2005-02-03T10:55:00.000-08:00

More on Hebrew

2005-01-18T06:30:00.000-08:00

Hebrews Fools and History

2005-01-14T10:51:00.000-08:00

HP Customer Support (read harassment)

2005-01-03T08:37:00.000-08:00

Where are the suds?

2004-12-29T13:42:00.000-08:00

Red- states I have been - White is a to do list

2004-11-15T05:48:00.000-08:00

create your own personalized map of the USA
or write about it on the open travel guide

Right click on map and choose view image to see entire map.

Excerpt of a highly technical discussion at work

2004-11-09T13:02:00.000-08:00

Give me a #6 Please

2004-10-08T06:12:00.000-07:00

Preserve Us

2004-10-07T06:23:00.000-07:00

Senior Nutrition - an oxymoron

2004-10-05T08:36:00.000-07:00